When I was pregnant with Ava, I think I had the normal feeling of “why am I doing this? I feel so bad taking time away from my little guy.” Ryan has always been the center of our world and it broke my heart to think that I was going to be unavailable to him. I was so worried how he would react and if he would resent me.
Now, almost a month and a half in, I am happy to say that I feel completely different. I never could have fathomed how strong his sibling bond would be. He loves Ava so much and it is so amazing to watch that relationship develop. Every morning, he comes into my room and asks “where’s little little.” Yup, she even has her first nickname at one month old courtesy of Ryan. He started calling her “little Ava” which morphed into “little” which has morphed into “little little.” Oh my heart!
It is funny how all these things I was freaked out about- being pregnant, becoming a mom, adding a second child- all turn out to not only be ok but exceed every expectation I could ever have. I thought having a kid was the best thing ever but it turns out having 2 is even better!
I wish I could have told my pregnant self how ok it was going to be. I wish I could have told myself that it is going to not only be fine, but it is going to be amazing!